Monday, July 19, 2010

stress out

i am running out of steam as i am finishing my assignments, test, and tutorials. i guess it happens to some of my classmates because there are some jerks who thought they are the free riders or they had contribute so much for their groups. i do not mind as long as they do not get on my nerves.

share some private opinion here because i don't want any of my classmates know what am i thinking. do you think vegetarian steamboat in unlimited buffet style will be successful?the consumer can eat as much as they can and pay u 19 bucks per pax. do you think 19 bucks for unlimited access vegetarian steamboat will be successful instead of charge you 50 bucks?the regular unlimited access steamboat charging at average 29 bucks. my opinion is 50 bucks and above because this is a new concept. the high price enable me to cut the price or do additional promotion in the future.

alright, cut the crap. tomorrow is my birthday. i wish the same wish as last year plus one more wish. err... i wish i can be better and stronger. are there anyone going to celebrate for me?i don't think so. my classmates was not bond like that time anymore. anyway, wish myself happy birthday. don't too overrate myself.

Monday, May 24, 2010

man with the hood

i am back to the blog world as i feel that there is no one that I can trust around me to tell my story to. Well, i backed to Penang to work while my holiday since 28th of january. I actually back to Poh Kong Jewellers to gain some achievement, so that I can have a good testimony when I apply for job in the future. ( I was thought that the achievement can be recorded in my Advanced Diploma certificate, not eventually)

So I work my ass off to achieve the target set by my boss - RM 125,000 from 1st of March to 15th of May. But I gave myself a target of RM 80,000 then I can take a rest d. For your information, the target that my boss gave is equals to RM 60,000 per month which is the target for those who already work for 2 to 3 years with the basic salary of RM 1,000 and above. But my basic salary is the junior sales which is just RM 700. But my mindset was just on the achievement so i just don't give a damn. Moreover, in their culture, all of the junior sales that just started to do sales, their first and second month sales will be around RM 15,000 to RM 20,000. So that had been a great pressure to me because i wasn't confident that i can achieve my boss's target or even my target.

Surprisingly, i did a RM 28,000 for the first month which is at the rank 4th (the outlet has 10 salespeoples and i am the newbie). No newbie had done this before except the rank 1st in the outlet when she was a newbie. So, she defined me as her threat that will challenge her top sales position. Then all the salespeople started to steal customer or share the lights and do a lot of tricks just to keep themselves in the 'competition'. But, i managed to do a RM35,000 plus a RM 40,000 of gold bar which put my overall performance to RM 100,000 by 21st of April. By that time, I felt like nothing to fight for, so I tendered my resignation then I left on the 23rd of April.

Actually, I had done a pure survey or experiment on my job experience. The previous job experience with Poh Kong Jewellers which i entered on the 27th december of 2008 and i left on 23rd of April 2009, that time I wasn't a salespeople yet. I was having training for those period of time. I managed to keep well relationship with all of the staffs (because i wasn't their competitor yet). But when the second trip back to Poh Kong which i promoted to a salespeople, our relationships all broken and they even see me as threat and sabotaj me to stop me from challenging the top sales. In conclusion, got sales = no friend, no sales = got brothers. (only apply in Poh Kong culture) But I would like to thanks to those seniors that willing to teach me a lot of their secrets and thanks to the boss for giving me the chance.

By the way, I met a girl named Pei Ching in Poh Kong. but she wasn't the same outlet as me. She is cute, but I won't think about that.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

harsh

what's your feeling when your group member use your example to complete his assignment while directly related to your assignment?i will feel nothing unless someone says he wrote it better than me then i will care. i thought assignment is a group effort that writing the same story. however, due to the consideration of group work, it divided to partial to each member 1 part or more but still writing the same story.

i was blamed. my group member blame me for writing the same story for example in the assignment. i don't like to be blame. fine!this is the first time i collaborate in assignment with them. is my fault for not meeting their requirement. i apologized. but what i want to clarify is the method wasn't wrong!

i miss kuala selangor!i miss penang!sobs..

Sunday, November 15, 2009

grief

i dont know what's wrong with me recently.
it feels like my luck just went off.
i am always experiencing you lose some when u get some.
i haven't back to my hometown for a month.
this is the first time i feel isolated from my family.
this is what i was dreaming for.
but, it doesn't feel good indeed.

a strange scene happen to me and Kian.
she called me a stranger.
i still remember she said she will ask me out if she come to KL.
so when she wrote her blog and said she came to KL,
i asked her why din't find me.
then she replied me who are you, stranger.
ouch, that's pain enough.
then i fight back and i can only say i hate you
because i really don't know how to fight back anymore.
actually it is good that everyone treat me as stranger.
i can understand why she treat me as stranger.
then she asked me to get out of her life.
i....am fine with that too.
i never be part of anyone's life i've thought so.
i doubt.
i doubt that what kind of me should i be.
a bad guy?
a good guy?

i've strived, thats what makes me left behind.
i've tried, thats what makes me stay alive.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

i came back from kuala selangor at 12am just now.
then i opened my laptop as usual and sneaked around at facebook.
then i saw desfin wrote that she was boring.
intentionally and unthoughtfully, i chatted with her.
first i thought why suddenly she was so nice to me.
then i asked her to give me her msn add (she deleted me)
and she gave me.
accidentally or godwish, she chatted with lawjoey(her best fren)
she din't recognize who i am, she thought i was someone else she known oso as Randy
i was fine with that.
then lawjoey recognized me
then she shouted OMG,OMG and OMG
she remembered who i am d.
then she blocked me instant
she hates me?
why?
she betrayed me and she hates me?
does she eligible to hate me?
too bad













i know you was scare of me
but hope you know that i am always hoping for the best for you

Sunday, October 4, 2009

dearth

i spent my whole day watching korean movie which was my favourite.
i like the feeling of the sadness it gave.
it makes me feel that i am still care of myself unlike when i went to KL few months ago.

my family came to KL for my cousin's wedding.
this cousin is my god sister as well.
but i departure from Penang with Liza first because she had an interview.
in the party i got to see the faces i dont like.
the uncle, aunty, and cousins.
especially my god parent.
i wonder why my parent allow them to take me as their god child.
in a circumstance, i told them that i want to go to Kuala Selangor to have my hair cut and eat the local delicious food.
immediately my god mother came to me and advise me in public:
you come to KL to study or be a food tester?
then i said i have to eat while i study right.
then she asked me why i want to do so.
i said i dont want to waste my chance to try the delicious as long as i still alive.
then she said to me in front of all people:
"you are wrong........"
1st thing i was angry is she nag me in front of so many people, they were listening.
2nd thing is she denies my opinion without any consideration.
3rd thing is she tried to manipulate my mind.
4th thing is the thing i always angry with her about. she never did her job as my god mother.
i hate to see her.
i hate to talk to her either.
but my mum keeps remind me that she is my god mother.
that irritate me more.
sometimes i would rather be an orphan like Liza than face all the fakers.

today, my dad asked me to go to MidValley to have lunch with my family.
today is my parent's 22nd annivesary.
then while eating, my mum kept complaining my hairstyle.
then she even compare me with my cousins.
that even piss me off. then i bursted.
i shouted you can complain me anything but not my hair!
dont manipulate me!
then after lunch i went back hostel immediately.













after years, i still miss you.
i will always love you and hope the best thing will happen to you all the time.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

motivation

637am in the morning when i am writing this article.
i am not that hardworking by waking up so early.
but is my time turned upside down since the exam period start.
i sleep when the sun rose, wake up when the sunset.
three sarcastic papers was over.
i had never felt like suicide when i exam.
but this time i really dont have any confident on passing the paper.
one more to go.economics for marketing.
economy is my talent i would say.but the matter is the calculations.
although i manage to get a B grade for the coursework, i still a little bit worry on how to pass this paper.
this 2 days, desfin posted some of her recent pics on facebook.
and i accidentally and i felt like it was fated to make me saw the pics.
she was my motivation on everything i do when i with her,
after broke up, the sadness and loneliness that she gave to me
had evolved to an intrinsic locus of control to me.
but time goes by, i lost interest on everything when i thought i managed to get over her that time.
i felt that love is so easy to get and easy to let go.
thats why i became dispassionate.
but this few months i changed again.
i become an extroverted people again, i used my intuition a lot again.
why is it so?
because i miss her so much. i seriously say i still have feeling on her.
she is like a mark, a tattoo to me. ineraseable.
her shadows, her smiles, her voice, and everything, suddenly haunted me back.
that makes me still believe there is true love.
i wont hope to be with her again, but i will demand for her happiness.
she will never be my partner anymore, but no one can stop me from faithful to her.
although she betrayed me, i still love her.
if possible, i will keep my love to her forever in my heart undiscover because she is the only factor of my motivation.
then i checked on her profile, stated,"in relationship with Justin Looi"
thats the guy who i wont ever waste my time write any of him in my blog.
and i can know something of her recent life in penang because
i was with her for 9 months, everything of her are seems to be
predictable to me.








what goes around comes way back around
i miss desfin.